It’s just that, I’ve always pictured it with you staying even through my worst possible attitude. I’ve always imagined you staying beside me when I can no longer put up with the things in my head. You see I want you to be there. To stay. Even through the hardest of times. Because I need you. And even when everything is in a blur, I want you to be the only clear image I come in sight. And you walked away. You ran away from me. And I just found it hard to come to grasp the sight of you walking away from me. You walked away. You left me. You so much believed that avoiding conflicts is the only way to the point that you’d rather leave me than face the conflict. It sucks you know. I could handle myself cooling down for a while and then talk things with you. But you leaving me behind, avoiding the things that clearly needed talking, that’s just despicable. It got me thinking that succeeding that scenario, I can’t expect you to be there for me through my lowest times. I admit I had my share of faults, but it’s just mean to walk away from the things you hurt and have them ride the guilt-trip just because they value you more than anything, literally anything. It hurts. It burns. It sucks as if I could feel my insides gaping and my breathing catches up one another.

Foreplay

You would rather think on the very first sight of the title that this would be an obscene post or a rude inquiry but I encourage you to tread on, you won’t lose anything perhaps, if you would. 🙂

We were born in this world as an empty set upon which we can take up endless and endless of possibilities. The mere birth of a person alters pretty much everything in the course of human history. You may feel neglected at times, like your existence has never contributed a worthwhile impact on the human race but you should remember that your emergence to the world pretty much affected the lives of everyone around you. It’s hard not to be condescending knowing that our very actions will forever ripple throughout hereon. And so thus every other human existing.

The things we do, the things others do and even the things that we chose not to do ultimately would impact our lives in ways we could never imagine. Who knows what could be the consequence of our actions committed on the present to the people that we are on the future? A simple gesture could mean nothing now, but who knows that that gesture would spun an endless string of romance. Or a little toy airplane given as a gift on our toddler days might ignite a long been hidden childhood love.

Although we are completely the faculty of our own decisions and actions we are utterly passive on the things that happen to us. That is one thing that we humans are flustered about. But whatever happens through the random actions and unknown variables of this endless rippling lake that is human possibility, we came to believe those ripples would actually and timely bring us to where we want to be. Keeping a blind faith on the universe and trusting the serendipity that it nimbly plays on it’s playful hands called “Fate” wholly gives humans the pretensive overconfidence that at some point we will have a great luck. Maybe we are hurting so much today, maybe everything has piled on upon us, or maybe hope is eluding from our very souls but on whatever circumstances we may be undertaking that we can nonchalantly still say, “Whenever it is, I know things will get better.”

As it is ostensibly said: love is a gift and thanks to others. Thanks to others for the fact that if not for each of their actions, none will be existent as such as the love spoken about. And it could be thought of this way: that the actions we have performed together with the things done by others are constantly in motion and helping us to a better situation. Trust that this guzzling heavy machinery that is the universe is continuously executing its plans to make you sure that we end up just where we want to be, at the right place and at the right time with the right person.

Being a girlfriend.

Being a girlfriend is not just about being beautiful and attractive for your guy. It’s not just about letting him chase you, letting him do sweet things every time you’re mad at him and not just receiving flowers and gifts during your anniversaries. It’s not about doing those girly things just to get his attention and not just about feeling mighty every time he did everything you want. It’s also being an emotional partner wherein you support him in every opportunity that he takes, you appreciate everything that he does for you and you thank him for doing it, you remind him on the things he must do and what he must not. Just because you know that you can always keep him on his feet, doesn’t mean you can manipulate him. You understand him not just as a partner but as individual too. you help him in every way showing him, that in a relationship, there’s no “I” or “you”, there’s only “we” and “us”. You know also that a man has their ego, and even when it become a little irritating sometimes, you still understand that it’s a part of his nature. A girlfriend is not just a term, it also has responsibilities that every girl must know. You’re a friend, a sister, a second mom, a teacher, and a best friend. 

Reason vs Feelings

This seems pretty illogical to me. And maybe this is one thing people should learn about: feelings should never override our reason. Often so on the course of once human life one may come across a regretful decision or a conscientious resolution to certain things. Those are the times that we succumbed to the feelings that we contain. Biologically speaking, our Amygdala, the mental faculty in our brain that concerns with the emotion, is apparently way smaller than the Frontal Lobe of the Cerebrum, which is responsible for our reasoning. Following that line, it is extremely odd for a species with that cerebral design to rather act on an illogical basis.

People should learn about how to suppress feelings and how they, on all deluding circumstances, should be able to maintain that certain sense of reason in every aspect of their decisions. I am not suggesting a reprimand for humans to have feelings, rather it could be taken as a sympathetic weep for humanity as people continue to regress on the evolutionary tree when humans have had smaller brains. I hope this serves as a wake-up call to the rather sleeping logical part of the human race.